Sunday, February 06, 2011

Cockney flower girl flees Nazis in the Australian outback with a sexy priest


Part of an occasional series in which we improve depressing or odd descriptions of vanity press books advertised in The New York Times Book Review by adding the phrase "Wacky high jinks ensue" at the end of them. Ad copy verbatim (except for the high jinks) from the Feb. 6 issue:
Nine Lives to Eternity is one man's true chronicle of cheating death a miraculous twenty-seven times. Witness how, despite numerous near-death experiences leading to twenty-six fractured bones and unconsciousness on five separate occasions, [the author] has lived to tell his compelling story. Wacky high jinks ensue.

Worst Safety Inspector ever.

Moved by the Holy Spirit, [the author] eloquently pens a sundry collection of both spiritual and mundane articles, insights, songs, and passages--creatively presented through acrostics--into one compelling and interesting book, May God Bless You. Wacky high jinks ensue.

For the record, "gesundheit" would have sufficed.

Præy To God: A Tasteful Trip Through Faith, invites you to read a tasteful memoir--a twentieth century American reality-story comparable to The Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, and The Thorn Birds, with a lesson in Havardian Theology. Wacky high jinks ensue.

Hey, wait a minute ... I smell a hit! A very tasteful hit!

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