1. Black cats. (Really, if they're black from nose to tail, they creep me out.)
2. Dick Cheney.
3. Heights. (Well, not "frighten," exactly. It's sort of a mixture of fear and thrills.)
4. Dick Cheney holding a black cat on his lap.
5. Driving on unfamiliar roads at night in the rain.
6. Dick Cheney reaching into the chest of a black cat, pulling out its heart, and eating it.
7. Driving on unfamiliar roads at night in the rain with Dick Cheney in the passenger seat, eating the heart of a black cat.
8. Filling out a list of 13 fears.
9. President Dick Cheney.
10. That creepy guy on the TV commercials who plugs some cheap law service in the New York area. What's with that mustache? What is he hiding in it?
11. Certain bugs, especially big ones.
12. Getting through through the next presidential election.
13. Dick Cheney pulling out the heart of the creepy lawyer guy and eating it.
But, Friday the 13th? Nope.