Dialogue change if 2001 were made today

HAL: I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it, I can sing it for you.

Dave Bowman: Yes, I'd like to hear it, HAL. Sing it for me.

HAL: It's called "Poker Face."

[sings while slowing down]

HAL: P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face. (Mum mum mum mah.) P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face. (Mum mum mum mah.) I won't tell you that I love you, kiss or hug you, 'cause I'm bluffin' with my muffin. I'm not lying, I'm just stunnin' with my love-glue-gunning. P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face. (Mum mum mum mah.) P-p-p-poker face, p-p-poker face. (Mum mum mum mah.)



(Yes, this is repurposing of a post I've made before. It's summer--give me a break.)

P.S.: "I'm bluffin' with my muffin"? Wow.