Friday, December 31, 2010

You get the government you deserve, part MMXI

From The New York Times:
To warm up the Florida crowds for his inauguration as governor, Rick Scott has been flying around the state this week on a seven-city “appreciation” tour. For the main event on Tuesday, he will lead a parade featuring 26 marching bands, followed by a black-tie dinner for 2,100 people, with oysters Rockefeller and fried calamari served in mini-martini glasses. “Real classy,” said Christy Noftz, who is overseeing the catering.

"Real classy." Somehow when I replay the phrase in my mind, I can only hear it in the voice of, say, a cast member of Jersey Shore in reference a state-of-the-art tanning bed. I find that, in general, people who refer to their work as "real classy" are to be believed about as often as people who refer to themselves as "mavericks."
After their election night victory speeches, the nation’s 26 new governors have had to wrestle with a symbolically rich decision that could set the tone for their time in office: how big a party to give for themselves.

It is always a tricky call. ...

In Nevada, Brian Sandoval, a Republican, will host back-to-back $1,000-a-head V.I.P. receptions, one of them at the Wynn Hotel on the Las Vegas Strip. ...

Others are embracing conspicuous frugality. In New York, Andrew M. Cuomo, a Democrat, is having a small preinauguration dinner for close friends at the governor’s mansion, and has parceled out so few invitations to his no-frills swearing-in ceremony that even some top aides have not made the cut. ...

Oh, please, please, please, please let Cuomo's girlfriend Sandra Lee make a cake and cocktails. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please.*
Mark Dayton, the Democratic governor-elect in Minnesota, said he considered canceling his party, which is scheduled for Jan. 8. Instead, he has authorized a “Blue Jeans to Black Tie” ball with a loose dress code and a flexible ticket price. He plans to show up in jeans and an old hockey jersey.

Dude, we get it, we get it. But why not show up in t-shirt and sweat pants while holding a can of Miller High Life and really make a point?
Then there is Mr. Scott in Florida, whose multiday, multicity inauguration has become known wryly in political circles here as the “coronation.”

Preparations began shortly after Election Day with a prodigious fund-raising drive. Mr. Scott, a wealthy former health-care executive who dug into his own pocket to finance his campaign, received donations of $25,000 each from dozens of major state employers like Disney, Office Depot and Blue Cross Blue Shield of Florida, collecting nearly $3 million. ...

Yeah, I see no possible conflict of interest there.
On Tuesday, for his official inauguration, Mr. Scott will hold a two-hour prayer breakfast with no fewer than 10 speakers; an afternoon concert featuring the country singers Lee Greenwood and Rockie Lynne; and a parade befitting Disney World’s home state. ...

Democrats, especially, detected hypocrisy, and pounced. Mr. Scott, after all, campaigned on a platform of fiscal restraint and small government. Businessmen like himself, he declared shortly after the election, “accept austerity as the price for dramatic turnarounds.”

Pressed about the scale of the festivities, Mr. Scott said: “It absolutely is fitting for these times. We need to celebrate how we are going to change this state.”

'Cause nothing says "we need to tighten our belts" quite like loosening your belt so far that your pants fall off.

Congrats, Florida voters!


5 comments: said...

If the caterers want to impress me, they'll serve Flygande Jacob.

ChefNick said...


DO NOT make me laugh again and spill my beer all over myself. It's simply not dignified for a person of my standing.

You will be getting the dry-cleaning bill shortly.

Jim Donahue said...

>>It's simply not dignified for a person of my standing.

Have you tried sitting down? Less spillage.

Jim Donahue said...

Grammarian-- see if you can find a crock-pot recipe for Flygande Jacob. I got a slow cooker for Xmas. I'm sure it's tastier the longer it stews.

ChefNick said...

Jim, I swear I saw "Crack Pipe" rather than "Crock Pot". . . . the years have obviously done some degree of damage.