Saturday, February 10, 2007

And now, back to The Velvet Blog Awards

Winner for Best Film Review:
As many of you know, I am an avid moviegoer and an astute judge of film quality. This old lady goes back to Charlie Chaplin, Zasu Pitts and Fatty Arbuckle. That should let you know of my experience and expertise. I recently reviewed "Dreamgirls" and commented on the comeback of Eddie Murphy. Now we get the old Eddie with all of his fat suits and silly makeup in a film with the dreadful title "Norbit". Why, oh why Eddie? Why resort to this lowbrow nonsense again? As I sat there at the free preview, I was dumbfounded. Do I complain to the ushers? Do I cause a stink? No, I wait patiently to fill out the comment card. Although afflicted with crippling artritis that makes typing and writing difficult, I gave the producers of this mess a piece of my mind. I then marched over to an usher to furthur complain and was treated rudely. I was humiliated and reminded that I got in for free and should "count my blessings"! This young man was talking down to me and I resented it. He had an earpiece in his ear and I asked him what he was listening to. His reply, "snoopy dog". That says it all.

I stumbled over this gem on Yahoo. I'm torn as to whether it's "real"* or not. The details seem a little too on-the-nose (Crippling arthritis? Snoopy Dog? Zasu Pitts??). Fake or otherwise, it made me laugh out loud.

And the next time I don't like a movie, I'm going to yell at the ushers, as we all know they're responsible.

*Quotation marks on purpose. The Net has blurred the boundary lines so much, I'm no longer sure that "reality" is even real anymore.

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