Thursday, March 04, 2010

Caffeine's effect on an itchy trigger finger also ought to be studied

In the news:
The debate over gun control is heating up at Starbucks.

Yes, the prices there are distressing, but let's be reasonable.
Gun owners bearing arms have been gathering at various Starbucks locations in states where it's legal to do so in public.

What?! People are arming bears at Starbucks?! They are very dangerous animals, people! They can tear your head off without blinking! And actually arming bears is just going to ... oh, wait. Bearing arms. Well, still, that's crazy.
That's sparked protests from gun-control advocates and kudos from pro-gun groups.

And when someone walks up to the counter with an Uzi to deliver kudos, apparently clerks nod their heads in agreement. It's a huge mystery.
The coffee chain says that its stores simply abide by state laws, and it is legal to carry weapons in 43 states. ...

Hmm. That's funny. I believe it's legal in most states to go barefoot, and yet many establishments kick me out for not wearing shoes. And don't get me started on shirts! (Really, don't! They're very confining!) Would anyone care to join me in a class-action lawsuit? Because that's clearly discriminatory.
The Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence then wrote a letter to Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz, urging Starbucks to enforce a similar policy. On its Web site, the Brady Campaign is soliciting supporters through an online petition that urges Starbucks to offer "espresso shots, not gunshots" and reverse its corporate policy.

On the other side of the debate, gun rights advocates are pleased with Starbucks' decision. Forum members of, a pro-gun Internet community with nearly 28,000 members, are posting that they are "impressed" with Starbucks' stance and will regularly buy the company's coffee to show support

I don't know about you, but I pine for the days when these people held espresso drinkers in disdain, so I knew where to avoid them.


Mark said...

A barefoot sit-in would be perfect. You are a genius of venti proportions.

Mark said...

Our right to bear feet!

Dave said...

Off point, but I refuse to use the words tall, whatever it is and venti (Google spell check doesn't know how it's spelled). I only get Starbucks at airports and ask for a small or a medium as is my wont. "Do you mean tall?" "If that's a small, yes." I get rolled eyes every now and again; but, it's worth it.

Further off point, did you know that venti is twenty in Italian, co-opted by Starbucks for large?

Jim Donahue said...

Dave: Yeah, the sizes are completely silly. Still, I like the coffee. (Not that I buy coffee out much. That's pretty infrequent, actually. I love the Fairway Organic Dark coffee I make at home.)

Mark: Bears without shoes?

fermicat said...

Well there you go... some people will manufacture a controversy if they can't find one that already exists.